Keith and The Girl comedy talk show: Episodes
<p>"Okay, you're gonna rape me for askin' this..."</p>
<p>"Just so you know, you're the worst, and you need to get your shit together."</p>
<p>"Bro, I knew somethin' was wrong when a little pretty white girl ran into a black man's arms. Somethin' is wrong here! Dead giveaway!"</p>
<p>"Pee in the bush, and I will give you the best place to shit!"</p>
<p>"I had a fondness for Satan."</p>
<p>"Do you black handshake the pussy?"</p>
<p>"She doesn't know how to wear a jacket she's so fuckin' horny."</p>
<p>"Keith is parading all of his drunk friends on the show today."</p>
<p>"I'VE NEVER SEEN SOMETHING THIS BARBARIC!"</p>
<p>"She's gonna be shocked at first. Probably even angry 'cause she knows you'll make a terrible dad..."</p>
<p>"You can't get away from Keith and The Girl!"</p>
<p>"I grab him by the shirt collar, and, in Spanish, I tell him to get the fuck outta here before I kill him."</p>
<p>"Maybe I know better, but they have to be talking about my dick."</p>
<p>"You're my partner, and you've been stealing money from me!"</p>
<p>"She was mauled to death, so, hope you had fun with your little jokes."</p>
<p>"When you fuck my son, Ben, do us all the favor and don't ask for permission."</p>
<p>"My skin is coming off. "</p>
<p>"Let me judge the neighborhood: How much is a forty at the bodega? How much are blowjobs in the schools?"</p>
<p>"Oh, I love the way it gapes!"</p>
<p>"She will be shaving her head within two years."</p>